Ashley Pfaff

Speaker: Samantha Caltabiano
Topic: Family Room
Comments: Family is important to a lot of people, and each one has their own stories. It is a great thing to feature as a Twitterive, but the creator must know where he/she wants to go with it. Samantha did not. I felt that she had so many ideas and directions that she wanted to take her story, that she could not limit herself and create a polished draft. When you don't know  much about a persons background it is hard to give them advice. In my opinion, the idea of secrets in her life could be focused on. It could feature the secret of her father cheating, and the fact that she didn't know about her brothers until recently. 

Speaker: Alexa Kalin
Topic: Hunting for the perfect house
Comments: Overall, I felt that this Twitterive was headed in the right direction. I enjoyed that the perspective on buying a house was given by the couple to be and the mother, but I felt as if there was not enough depth to it. It was mostly covered by writing, and if more genres were incorporated I feel as if more emotion could be felt by the readers. I will point out though that I enjoyed the diary entry that was placed in the beginning. It would be nice for her to possibly turn that into her repetend.

Speaker: Sam Olenowski
Topic: Grandfather's Story
Comments: For Sam's Twitterive, there was not much constructive criticism that I could give her. Overall, it seemed to be complete. One thing that I will point out, is that I loved the incorporation of the bible verses with her Aunts and Uncles names, since they were all featured in the bible. It was a very creative genre. She represented the character of her grandfather to the fullest, and I was able to understand and respect the man that he one was. Also, the ending, where she tied both of their lives together with a picture, was a great added touch. It showed the ability to have a connection with someone in your life that passed away before you could have the chance to meet them personally.

Speaker: Michael Youngkin
Topic: limbic space
Comments: In all honesty, there is not much that I could say about this piece. It is tough to offer someone suggestions when they themself have no idea what they are looking to pursue. One thing that I will point out, is that I enjoyed the idea of the loss that he expresses, he just needs to figure out exactly where to go with it. Does he want to associate his Twitterive with that feeling in general? o r does he want to concentrate on what caused that feeling? It is something that a lot of us have been through, so I believe that the finished product will be both moving and relatable.

Speaker: Stephanie Bowser
Topic: Life with Dance
Comments: Stephanie's presentation honestly moved me. I had been in her TLC2 class, so I remember her mentioning her Turrets and Dance when we presented our "Me boxes", but I never got to know her enough to realize that she danced as an escape. The fact that she turned to dance to feel "normal" inspired me, and I loved that she does not let her flaws take control of her. I could not imagine dealing with something like that everyday, and for her to make a joke out of it and laugh it off made me grow respect for the person that she is. One thing that I really enjoyed about her Twitterive was her confessional style video. It allowed me to get to know her feelings towards her Turrets, and it put a highly emotional twist into her story. The only suggestion that I can make is to move it too a different spot in her narrative, maybe as an intermission, because it shows emotions that should be expressed on their own.

Speaker: Katie Collins
Topic: Relationship with father - Alcoholism
Comments: Listening to Katie's story about her lack of relationship with her parents, especially her Father because of his tendencies to abuse alcohol, made me realize how grateful I am to have a strong and supportive relationship with both my mother and father. She gave us great background information about her feelings towards her fathers abuse and her respect for her grandparents, but I found myself wanting more. She made it clear that her grandparents became her parents, but as I read her twitterive I noticed that some information was missing. Where was her mother during this process? Her siblings? During our discussion she told us that her mother spent her life taking care of her husband, and that she was barely in her life also. If it was included, I feel that a better connection would be made between her and her readers. One thing I did enjoy though, were her letters to her father, which gave her twitterive a sense of emotion.

Speaker: David Lucas
Topic: His battle with cancer
Comments: I will be honest, David's presentation made my eyes tear up. I give him credit for having the strength to tell us such a personal story about his battle with cancer. I could not imagine dealing with such a life changing event. I know I have been through some rough patches, but nothing that  can compare to the challenges that both him and his parents went through. I wish my thoughts could be beneficial and that I could offer changes, but I felt that the Twitterive that he presented to us today could be his final draft. It is hard to tell someone to add or take out things when it is such an emotional topic. I felt like I gained a sense of what he went through, and the picture story really helped. 

Speaker: Darren Guant
Topic: A day in the life of a child
Comments: I have always wondered what little kids see in today's world. It is hard to draw my thoughts back to my childhood and remember how I saw and heard different events, so Darren's twitterive came as interesting to me. I love how he took his job and used it help show us how children see things and view adult situations. His genres also helped me gain a good sense of children, especially when he had one of his preschoolers carry around the camera. Something I also enjoyed was the day in the life of a preschooler schedule. A few suggestions that I would make though, is too add his own dialogue to the video, rather than having just a walk through. It is possible to make the video more of a comedic genre by talking like a child and going through his thought process while he makes his way through the school.